from PIAOR’s Book of Quotations, Page 1982

by Lincoln Sedlacek

“Something I learned early on is that, when I’m on the field and I’m about to call the play,  I can’t worry about what I can’t control… But what I can control is my attitude, my effort, and my focus every day. Well, that, and gauge pressure of the game balls. And the impartiality of the judge. And, to some degree, the demographics of the jury members. Whether or not a monetary incentive is given to a low-level intern to falsely confess to wrong-doing and take the fall for you, and the size of that incentive. The quality of a courtroom artist’s sketch of you, if you decide you care about that sort of thing. Not the size of your penis, though. I’ve tried to control that, and it doesn’t work.”
–Tom Brady