by Lincoln Sedlacek
A wreath of fall leaves, with a sign nestled in it reading, “You are currently at higher risk of the roof of this house caving in and killing you than you are of falling prey to a shark attack.”
There’s a doggy-door, but it’s been made to look like a just-used guillotine with a fake severed dog head next to it.
Spiderwebs. A family of spiders is wrapped in its own web in the center of the decal, surrounded by grasshoppers holding tiny forks and knives. Beneath the scene is a sign that says, “Welcome!”
The door is covered to look like a life-size coffin, standing on end and facing whoever is at the door. The bottom of the coffin is a mirror.
A large sticker looks like blood seeping from the top of the door frame. In center, it says, “Even though this Halloween decoration is all in good fun, you really have no way of knowing that I don’t drink the blood of infants each and every night.”