Tips for Following Through on Your 2016 New Year’s Resolutions

by Lincoln Sedlacek

  • Want to lose weight and get in shape in 2015? “You are what you eat,” the adage goes – so try eating Cristiano Ronaldo or Serena Williams.
  • Lots of people are trying to find God, but doing so takes time. Practice by going through Where’s Waldo? books and watching old episodes of Where in the World Is Carmen Sandiego?
  • You’re sure to exercise and travel more if you’re on the run from your local mafia.
  • Do you think you watch too much TV? Try watching Here Comes Honey Boo Boo – it is the pinnacle of television achievement, and after viewing it you will never feel the need to watch anything ever again.
  • Is one of your resolutions to “enjoy life to the fullest”? Try coming up with some less stupid resolutions.