Other Things Carrie Underwood Did to the Car of That Guy Who Cheated on Her

by Lincoln Sedlacek

  • Spilled Orange Soda in the cup holder
  • Turned the radio to a station he didn’t like
  • Took the sun shade out of the windshield
  • Reprogrammed the GPS so that when he tried to go home, it took him to Rahway, NJ
  • Left an open can of tuna fish to rot in a hard-to-reach spot
  • Moved it to the other side of the parking lot so he’d think it was stolen
  • Filled the CD player with Nicholas Sparks audiobooks
  • Left a post-it on the steering wheel saying she’d loosened one of the nuts on one of the hubcaps, but not specifying which one
  • Wrote “WASH ME ;-)” in the dirt on the rear windshield
  • Put his dead body in the trunk